Brampton V’s Quito – Road Etiquette

Ok don’t worry I am not going to be one of these smug expats who go on about how amazing their lives are now they have left crapy UK. I truly feel both have positive points and some days I do crave the normality and ease of home. A small example of this is crossing the road, each morning at 7am on my way to my first class ( I Know! 7am who the fuck wants to learn English at this time) I dice with death trying to cross two ( yes only two) normal size roads! It’s like The cryptic maze trying to judge at what speed they are coming if they are even going to turn onto your road ( indicators what are they for?) and finally if they are going to speed up and aim for you! I feel I honestly live life on the edge everyday. I want to start giving out high fives when I get to work, because I am so happy to get there alive with all limbs intact. There are zebra crossing but they are seen as silly white lines someone has painted on the road!?

However, road etiquette in Brampton is at the other end of the scale. As a driver there have been so many times that I have become Gordon Ramsay behind the wheel with the old folk who still drive and REALLY should have stopped 20 years ago! Classic example everyday that flower lorry stops outside Daisy Chain leaving only one side of the road to pass it, this is fine not problem people have to work and we can deal with this……. However, along comes Margret/ Doris or whatever this particular one is called in her Volvo ( which is too big for her and she always takes 10 minutes to park outside the post office, but that’s another story)and she spots Ethel  walking back up to the estate and must tell her about the next church meeting. So instead of calling her later she decides to block the one free side of the road! We all know that 10 minutes before she has taken 5 bloody minutes to try and get that gigantic Volvo through the cut from the estate. So if you’re the poor bastard who has followed her down from there you have already taken 15minutes to drive 200 yards.

I think the only answer is for me to become a driver in Ecuador and a pedestrian in Brampton!